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Today is
awful for me. The house is too
quiet. George does not want to nor care
to do anything. I am listless and just
want to get out and LIVE! Between caring
for George’s mom which has tied us down – and now this, is there a point in
which I get to scream “Let’s get out of Dodge!” and then just DO it! If there is, today would be the day.
After
spending two weeks “waiting”, not going anywhere and, with the exception of
work (and my couple of early AM workouts) and now this next “waiting” period
until September 5th I am likely to go stir crazy.
I think
George thought that I may have been kidding when I remarked to his sister
yesterday that, “you might get a phone call saying we want to get out of town
for the evening or the night”. Honestly,
I couldn’t be farther from the truth. If
the next few months are to be mired down in appointments, surgeries,
chemotherapy – then I really do need a vacation NOW! It wouldn’t be the vacation I had hoped for,
but at least get out and try to find some normalcy, that would be nice. This may be the only chance we have to do
something that, not only is non-cancer related, but is non-mom related as
well. Aside from a CT scan, there is
nothing else needing to be done for two weeks.
While George
would prefer to sit and do nothing, scourging the internet for more news on the
diagnosis, looking at survival rates, procedures, etc. I would prefer to live
in THIS moment and finding some good stuff to think about for awhile. The only
thing that has changed between two weeks ago and now is that we “know”
something isn’t right… other than that there are no symptoms associated with
the disease that would prevent us from getting away.
Like The Cat
in the Hat… I do not like this, I do not like this at all.
… and the
old Calgon commercial… “Take me away!”
… and the
movie title, “Something’s Gotta Give”.
Now, if I
could only convince my husband…..
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