The C Word – A New Battle Day 6 - Line Dancing Moves

Today feels like a line dance of the cancer variety.  Two steps forward, shuffle to the right, one step back, one step forward, one step back and repeat. 

We got some really good zzzz’s last night.  The diahrrea finally started subsiding after 9:30PM.  Only two sleep interruptions some 3-4 hours apart and then straight back to bed for more sleep.  We both slept in – even me, which is unusual.  Normally by 5 or 6AM I have had enough.  Good to go for the day.  Not so today.  I stayed with my head under the pillows until Dr. Bastidas showed up at 6:30 this morning. 

We reported about our night and how George was reacting to medications, etc.  He took out the one drain left (JP) and covered the hole in gauze.  Checked out the suture lines and replaced the one bandage at the lower end that we had a nurse put there yesterday because it was a little red and we didn’t want it rubbing against clothing.  He gave the thumbs up for regular diet – any food goes.  (Of course, still being careful - - and George is not yet very hungry).  He talked about starting to switch over some of the medications and tube feedings but had not wanted to do that until George’s GI system was working better.  All good things.

We asked if he could give us a ballpark about our discharge date and he said perhaps by the weekend (of course, barring any unexpected hurdles).

First thing on George’s menu – Rice Krispies with sugar and milk.  He ate just a small bit which is fine – and drank all the milk – and that all appeared to settle okay. PT came in shortly after that and they took a walk halfway down the hall and back. Then, back to bed where he promptly fell asleep.

Our oncologist, Dr. Sheh popped in for what he said was a social visit. He has not yet been here – and pathology reports are not in yet, so he just wanted to see how George was doing.  We chatted a little bit about what he expects to see.  He said he doesn’t expect any surprises about a change in pathology from the last time to this time.  That being “low grade” tumors.  We know that low grade tumors have less choices available for treatment than higher grade (I am not sure why exactly this is).  He said he would start researching trials and studies to see what may be out there.  He also indicated that he would likely send tissue out for DNA testing because there is one “variety” of cancer (if it is genetically based) that responds to a specific treatment.  At any rate, a DNA test will show better what types of cells we are dealing with and will hone in on best treatment for that.  I told him that we were part of a couple of groups and saw discussions on some chemo treatments.  He asked if they were working.  I told him that a couple of them seemed to be going okay.  In most cases it added a couple of years on.  He thought that was good.  (That’s NOT what I thought.  I don’t like that at all!)

I napped for a short bit today myself this morning and then, because my mind kept spinning to the conversation with Dr. Sheh and I found myself weeping… actually on and off all day.  Trying to be strong for George – yet feeling like a cloud is hanging over my shoulder today.  Fortunately he has been sleeping all day today so I can pull myself together for the moments he is awake.  (He will read this later  - and it won’t be fun for him to read – but he knows that the “elephant is back in the room” anyway.) 

I tried to keep myself busy today but having a hard time concentrating and am still rather tired. 

This afternoon a laid down for a nap again.  After a bit George needed to go to the restroom again.  We went in there and as he got up to head back to the room I saw all this fluid on the floor.  At first I thought maybe he was still peeing but didn’t know it, but when I lifted his gown there was fluid spewing from the suture area.  It looked like a water faucet. I tried to pull the emergency rope in the bathroom to summon help but am not sure it is working.  Mind you, we had called for a nurse 20 minutes earlier because his IV line was beeping that it was done yet no nurse had yet responded to that either.  Finally I grabbed some paper towels and asked George to hold it against his belly while I rang them again.  I grabbed the call button on the bed and rang again and when nobody responded right away I ran to the hallway to try to get help.  One of the nursing assistants was walking by and I said, please come, I need help!  We finally managed to get the Charge nurse to come to the room and grab some towels and help him to the bed to lay down.  I directed George where to step so he wouldn’t step in the puddles of fluid near his feet.  (How I managed to do that I will never know – pure luck!)  The nurse held compression on the wound while we worked to clean up a little bit.  The nursing assistant tried to put a clean gown on George and we said, “forget the gown for now!”. I mean, really, let’s get our priorities straight here!  Jashley, the charge nurse, told our nurse that, for now we’ll just cover with gauze and tape up.  She instructed her to take his vitals and call Dr. Bastidas.  She did that and came in to let us know that he instructed them to find a rep or someone certified in the hospital to put on a clean vacuum bandage (like he had before that was taken off yesterday.  In the meantime, George is scared S***less about having to get up to use the restroom tonight for fear of it flowing like that again.  Especially since he has to use his abdominal area in order to get out of bed!

Currently George fell back to sleep on his bed, covered in blankets, as we await whatever the next step might be.  I am so grateful that the bathroom trips are not very frequent – otherwise this would be much more critical. 

5:15pm – the factory rep just arrived and will coach the nurse how to put the new vacuum therapy bandage on.  (She is not allowed to touch the patient.)  First they need to clean up what’s there as it is still oozing a whole lot.  This process could take up to an hour.

5:45pm – after seeing how much was oozing out of the belly, another call was made to Dr. Bastidas (who, we found out, is out of town for the night).  They are not going to put the vacuum bandage over the wound yet.  He has ordered NPO (nothing by mouth) for now (poor George, he was only just looking forward to a little bit of food, even if it was a glass of milk) – and now he can’t even have ice chips!!  They are going to put the gastric drain back in place and have turned off the tube feeding. For now, we are going to just keep changing out the bandages on his belly - - which are soaking up the wound stuff like a sponge so that will have to be done frequently.  They are ordering a lab tech to come and take a sample of the fluid.  She said something about finding out if a surgeon is on duty to come take a look – possibly put some sort of drain in, but not sure of that.  Dr. Bastidas will be back in town in the morning as well.  This situation is still rather fluid (in more ways than one as you see) so whatever I am being told now could very well change in 30 minutes. 

6:30pm – Nurse came in and took sample to send to lab.  Is putting in the gastric drain (which is a gravity drain that drains the stomach).  Then she will cover the wound.  I can see the one she just put on after she took the sample a short while ago and it is already saturated.  A CT scan has been ordered up so at 7 he is to get a bit of oral contrast, again at 8 and the scan will be done at 9. 

8:30pm – The nurse brought in the barium for George to drink and it was the same size as what he’s had for scans in the past…. Only thing is he has not had more than a ½ cup of fluid at any given time since he feels nauseas.  So nurse checked to see if it could be put through his J-tube feeder.  By the time she did that the 7 o’clock hour had passed.  Was closer to 8PM - - so everything is pushed back an hour from that.

In the meantime, a good buddy of his stopped in so they visited for a bit. 

So no updated news right now to give you and probably won’t have any news until morning about what is going on.   It’s going to be a long night of getting the nurses to change the dressing regularly. 

I will try to post a mid-day update tomorrow for those following this.  Prayers!!  Thank you!

The C Word – A New Battle Day 5 - Milestone reached

For those in the PMP world, one of the most talked about topics is bowel movements.  Too little or too much is the bane of existence.  Trying to keep controlled is a fine line, balancing the needs of the human body as much as possible in order to lead as normal a life as is possible.

For many, the loss of parts of their intestinal tracts, usually means that they either must use dietary means to keep things under control or medications or a combination of the two.  On the flip side, due to the surgeries they have endured, they can be more prone to small bowel obstructions (SBO’s) which can required trips to the emergency room to help alleviate the problem and sometimes I see from postings by others with SBO that additional surgery can be required to rectify the situation. 

We knew there were going to be a couple of significant milestones after this surgery.  Priority one is managing pain adequately.  I think that’s pretty much complete.  Second is working on mobility.  Although George is weak, he is able to do short distances with the ultimate goal being able to get in and out of the house and to and from the bathroom.  I think he can do that, not easily yet, but he can.  Major milestone is release of gas and/or bodily fluids.  That was not only met at 2:30AM – but is now flowing very freely, almost too freely.  Not as bad (yet) as our worst two days ever the last time – but 9 times in 12 hours.  Is it too early to discuss an Immodium regime to slow it down a little bit??

However, in between those times he is doing one of two things:  Sleeping (and, from where I sit it looks like a pretty good slumber) or sitting up in his chair.  Well, 3 things – in and out of the bathroom because…. He can!  Today the tubes that made it cumbersome to move away from the bed were removed!  Woo hoo!  The only thing he is tethered to is his IV pole.  (The oxygen/heart rate machine is something I can disconnect whenever he needs to move away from the bed.)  He’s not feeling very well today – but he is trying to do the things he can.  And, my lesson learned from the last time is that I am not pushing things on him.  I ask him, but if the answer is no, I accept that and let him be the director as much as possible. 

Today the doctor removed the suction tape over the sutures so those are now exposed.  Ow, that hurt!  Tomorrow the JP drain will come out.  Day by day.  Diet is now changed from clear liquids to full liquid – so instead of chicken broth he can have pureed chicken noodles soup! LOL!  Oh, and pudding and ice cream and milk.  Those are his go to things, I think.  Probably will do this for a day or two and then bump it up a notch.

Next time we see the doctor we will ask if there is a time frame for going home. I’m not sure what final milestones will be.  They may want to see how he tolerates solid foods.  Maybe not.  Maybe soft easy foods can be done at home and a regiment that slowly adds things can be done.  Just not sure so that will be a question we may get answered tomorrow when we ask for an estimated or definitive timeline.  

I should probably see about meeting with a case worker as well to help determine what he will need when going home so we can order up the necessary items.  I think we have to arrange for a home health nurse to stop in periodically to check on things since we are going home with a feeding tube in place. 

I forgot to mention that yesterday the nurses on this surgical floor had first year nurses from a local school to mentor them.  Each nurse had one or two students assigned to them.  The girls were able to do some of the procedures with the help of their instructor and/or teaching supervisor.  The one with our nurse came in to do her first glucose stick so the instructor had to be with her.  As she looked around our room she noticed all the different machines we had and asked if she could bring all of them in at some point during the day to explain it all to them.  She was respectful and knew George was resting.  I asked them to come by after lunch as by then I thought George might be a little better after having meds adjusted and fluids pumped.  Before she brought them in I gave them some background about what has happened with George in the past two years and let them know why he was hooked up to so much equipment.  I then got to listen to the instructor as she told the girls about each item:  The3 IV pumps/monitor and why they were set up that way, the pain management device, the tube feeding and TPN (nourishment by IV), the Gastric (G) Drain and Foley, the suture “vacuum”, etc.  So, I benefitted from that little bit as well.  Not lost to me was the fact that my husband had a host of medical equipment all in one room that is atypical of most procedures those girls will see in their workplace.  Not that they won’t see them, just not very often. 

Had just two visitors today, Stan (former co-worker of George’s) and Kim (neighbor).  Visitors are more for me than George.  He doesn’t last too long and doesn’t participate in conversations too much.  He did try to for a bit, but even talking exhausts him.  If it weren’t for a few visitors sprinkled into the mix, it is very quiet for me as George does not “do” television in the hospital, not even for background noise.  I usually walk around most of the day with my earbuds in listening to music while I crochet, browse facebook or do some office work. 

Summary:  A productive day.  Hopefully a relatively peaceful night.  I imagine I will be woken up a few times for bathroom runs, but with luck there will be at least 2 hour gaps between them. 

No pathology report given to us just yet.  Patiently waiting for that.  

The C Word – A New Battle Day 4 - A Frustrated Patient

Last night and today was not only a challenge for me but for George.  He knows what he is putting me through and that frustrates him.  Not being able to find a comfortable position to sit or lay down frustrates him.  Not being able to eat even very minute swigs of water or ice without getting nauseous frustrates him. So, today was a frustrating day all around.

After the horrendous night last night and just not finding peace for more than short periods of time, we sent a note to the doctor.  He, in turn, ordered up some extra IV fluids and some additional anti-nausea medications.  The first was administered this morning (Reglan) and did not produce much effect to start with.  Then, via IV, he got a healthy dose of the Zofran.  Also got the instructions that he should not take much liquid orally until things settle down.

It is 7PM and while the nausea is not entirely controlled (and I should add that this entire time it is dry heaves because there is not real food going into the belly), the bouts last just 20 or 30 seconds and then he is done.  And, it is longer in between these spells. 

Since this afternoon at about 2:30 he has been doing a lot of really good sleeping.  I even had the chance for an hour nap today as it was pretty quiet on the floor and we did not have many visitors dropping by.  This evening our friends, Keith and Bonnie, came by to spot me so I could go home to shower (yeah!), water the plants, and feed my piggly wiggly hummingbirds.  A welcome break – and it was nice to warm up (90 outside – 65 in George’s room!) 

I am hoping that we will start to “turn the corner” and get the nausea under control.  If we can do that we can lose at least one more “hook up” and get George’s own body to start learning to do what it needs to do.  The sooner he can get that going, the sooner he can go home.  Still not sure how long it will be before we can be discharged…. No one does.  It all depends on George’s recovery and even he is not in control of that.

Time to sign off as there is little to report today other than reiterating the same thing over and over again.  Wanting to turn in early myself and try to catch up on sleep while George does the same.  Hoping for a better day each morning. 

Tomorrow or the next day we will be getting pathology reports to enable us to determine what our choices going forward will be.  Trying to remain positive.  It can be difficult when we believe we have very few, if any choices for treatments.  Trying to believe that we will find something that will work for George. 

For now – sweet dreams for us.  Tomorrow will take care of itself.

The C Word – A New Battle Day 3.5 - Horrible Night

Long, long night.  It actually started while I was preparing my blog journal for the day.  Constant up and down for adjustments, etc.  This process went on just about all night long. 

Hot or cold meant blanket up or down.  Back hurt, head up, head down, pillow underneath back  - no take it out.  Ice chips. Barf bucket. Call the nurse.  Make adjustments.  Sit in bed – sit in chair – no back to bed.  Constant, constant demands to try to make him comfortable.

At midnite I finally told him he needed to call and use just the nursing staff as I was exhausted and my meds were kicking in and making me loopy.  I had to lie down for a short bit. 

Got in a snooze for about 1 ½ hours after the gave George some anti-nausea meds AND a sleep aid.  I believe he slept for about an hour.  Then, the nausea woke him up and therefore I was also up. 

I got a little snippy.  Seemed like every time I climbed back into bed I had to get up again.  If I just sat and waited for something to happen, it didn’t.  At one point I actually sat in the chair next to his bed with a pillow resting against the bed. I think it was 2:30 - he fell asleep for about an hour to hour and a half.  He will say he did not sleep because he threw up and then the nurse came in.  I told him I was sleeping right next to him and that could not possibly have happened.  He argued with me!?  Really?

Up at 4:30 and back in a chair.  Dry heaves.  Cold.  Just not feeling well.  Might as well do the morning weigh in.  Down 3 pounds so he is losing some of the extra fluids though his hands are still swollen.

6AM – Back to bed.  He appears to be sleeping at least for now.  I think I will try as well.

Horrible horrible night after a fairly decent day.  

The C Word – A New Battle Day 3 - Baby step progress

Slept pretty good last night - - at least I did.  I turned lights out early (for this place) in order to try to get some good zz’s.  George woke up at 4AM to go to the bathroom so I called the nurse/CNA in for assistance and right away said, “While we’ve got him up, let’s get him weighed so we don’t have to worry about that later.”  “Good idea!”, she said!!  He has lost only a pound.  He is in the range of where he was before this whole obstruction occurred – but is about 18 pounds up from where he was on Wednesday morning. 

Went back to sleep and made it until 7 when he had to go again… I guess that’s progress because it is more than yesterday.  So it is good that he is expelling some extra fluids. 

It think it was around 8:30 when we got him up to sit in a chair by his bed.  Shortly after that, PT Nina came in and they were able to walk half way down the long hallway and back.  She was pleased with that.  He sat up for a short while longer and then crashed for a few hours.  Since he seemed particularly grumpy this morning, I was glad he was getting some sleep. 

One of the discussions with the morning nurse this morning was the fact that he needs to walk but because he gets dizzy he has difficulty even attempting to do so.  She told us that while it could be the dilaudid, it might also be because some of his blood counts were low today. We thought Dr. B was on call today and we could ask him when he came in, but it was another doctor on call today.  She said if we wanted to contact Dr. B that we could do so, but as a nurse on staff, she could not since he was not the on-call doctor.  So I text messaged Dr. B and told him the circumstance and gave him the low counts, etc.  He responded with a couple of questions and I sent him pictures and answers.  He said he would order up a few things to see if they would help.  One thing was extra IV fluids.  Also some X-rays. 

This afternoon they came to get him for X-rays.  Let me tell you, that was a huge feat!  His TPN line is very short and cannot be too far from the bed or it will yank out, as well as his central lines.  So he had a tight grip on those so they wouldn’t pull out during the ride.  Trying to get “Chromium Chrissy” and the bed out the door was very difficult.  Then we tried an elevator that was too narrow and had to back out of it and try another one wide enough for the bed and the pole.  Then, we got down to the X-ray room and had to maneuver into it.  They had to use two different machines and techniques to get the pictures they needed! 

Shortly coming back upstairs, PT Nina arrived and George actually was feeling pretty good and made a trip ALL the way to the other end of the hallway and back and sat in a chair for a short while afterward.  That is progress.  I think the extra fluids are helping!  Hurrah!  He actually looks and feels better and hasn’t been continually pushing the dilaudid button. 

For the first time in a long time, George feels hunger.  Unfortunately, he is restricted to 750ml of fluids a day (broth, jello, popsicle, tea, juice) for now. They bring up about ½ cup of broth for a “meal”.  But the fact he feels hunger is something to behold!!  He drank his broth and settled in for a nap until Dr. Bastidas arrives to see how things are going.

This evening George tried to watch a little TV (first time all week) but nothing really on.  So I offered to pull out his iPad so he could entertain himself.  He tried to do so from sitting in the bed with the tray in front of him but soon decided to sit in his chair for a bit.  So he’s been sitting up for a while. 

Dr. Bastidas came in to let us know how the tests looked and to see how George was doing.  Was glad to see him sitting up.  Xray showed that there are gas bubbles making their way down the intestinal tract so he is encouraged and feels that it won’t be too long before the milestone of passing gas is behind us.  It’s a good sign.  Once that happens they will cap off the GI tube which is draining the stomach and see how things go.  If all goes well, then he will be off the liquid diet and can order anything off the menu.  Not sure a cheeseburger will be the first thing he orders.

Since George had been up and catching up on his iPad he read my blogs for the past few days.  He asked Dr. B about the surgery and so forth because he realized he did not fully comprehend what we had told him yesterday.  I knew that it had not yet registered, so now that he is slowly coming around he is having to come to terms with the scope of things.

He asked Dr. B about what we all have been thinking, “if this is still considered low grade then how to it spread so quickly?”  Dr. B said that’s why he did a frozen sample for testing.  However, we need to wait for the full report.  I mentioned that we had not yet heard from the oncologist and he said that we won’t until after pathology comes out. 

So, today had it’s ups and its down, but certainly forward progress has been made.  It has taken me a while to write this final bit (I worked on it off and on during the day) because, just like last time, often as I just sit down and get situated George needs something, i.e. adjust the head of the bed up or down, cover him, uncover him, give him CPAP and turn it on or off, get a sip of water, etc., etc., etc.  Up and down, I get a lot of exercise!!  He keeps me hopping that is for sure!! 

We had only one visitor today, Bonnie.  Nice time catching up with her.  She and Keith will be back tomorrow to spot me so I can go home, take a shower, check my mail, etc.  I don’t want to be in competition with George for who can go the longest without taking a shower!  Haha!!

Side note:  I forgot to mention something very touching that occurred on Wednesday afternoon.  After I met with Dr. Bastidas post surgery and went to deliver the news to those waiting with me, I was visibly upset.  A man in the waiting room, dressed in biker-like clothes (sorry to classify – but most know what I mean), came over to us and asked if he could pray with and for us.  He knelt in front of me and took my hands and Victoria and Cathy also put their hands out.  He proceeded to ask for healing for whomever we were upset about.  He spent a few minutes in prayer.  We thanked him and he went back and took his seat.  What a phenomenal gesture from a complete stranger.  I asked his name but cannot remember it now.  But this is an example of what we should be doing for others - - Note to self:  Don’t be afraid to ask to pray for and with others?!?! 

The C Word – A New Battle Day 2 - Frustrated patient

The past 24 hours have been a tad bit frustrating.  As noted in yesterday’s journal, I received a call from George about an hour after I had gotten home because we were told that a bed would not be available on the regular surgical recovery floor – or the chances were pretty slim.  Apparently when Dr. Bastidas got back to the hospital to check on George he noted that he was still in ICU and he went about to get him moved.  He arrived at George’s bedside just about 9PM.  George was surprised as he had just fallen asleep.  George then called me and I told him I would meet him at his new room since he told me they were “packing him up” as he spoke. When I arrived, he was not yet there -  and did not make it down for about an hour after my arrival. 

Since he arrived at the magical hour of shift change, he had to endure two sets of vital checking, one with the shift going off and one with the shift coming on.  Then his new nurse arrive about 11:30 and proceeded to do some updates with his equipment that apparently are not things available in ICU.  One of the things that has to take place regularly is flushing out George’s TPN (feeding tube) line.  In ICU they used a syringe to do this periodically.  Here, they add another water bag to the line and program the unit to flush the lines every four hour so there is no need for someone to come in and do it.  Hmmm, why is one floor able to have the equipment and not another?? 

At midnight she completed all the things she needed to do and told us that things should be quiet until vital needed to be done at about 3:30AM.  She left the room – and not 5 minutes later one of George’s IV lines starts beeping loudly.  Nurse Valena was nearby and heard it and came in quickly to take care of the “air in the line” coding.  She left the room –and 5 minutes later something else started beeping – the compression line for George’s calves.  She came in and took care of that.  Five minutes later – and the TPN line started up again so we called her in again.  She left and five minutes later the compression line started to beep again.  Seriously?!?!?!  What the heck is this all about!  That was the last of the beeping for the night so we were grateful she figured it all out.

George woke me up at 5AM to use the urinal and we called the nurse in for help (it is a major feat to accomplish getting out of bed with all the tubes, etc.)  Since he was up she fetched the scale so he could be weighed because she knew the doctor would be looking for that number in the system.  A few more things and, 40 minutes later we attempted to get just a little more sleep. 

The next shift came on and things went relatively smoothly.  Since George knew that we needed to PT sessions today, just before ten he asked if I could find the therapist and have her come in.  I told him that the nurse would be in shortly to do an additional TPN flush and we could find out.  At that time, George decided he wanted to try sitting up for a bit so the nurse and CNA came in to help get him situated.  Nina, the PT, arrived about 11 and got him to take two walks to the door and back.  George complains about the “room spinning” and we think that is the dilaudid.  We need to ask Dr. B if there is something else that will adequately administer a pain medication without the spinning because we need George to be able to get up and walk around more but he can’t if the spinning keeps on happening.  Too unsteady for that!

This afternoon was very frustrating as George’s pain medication line ran out and the unit started beeping like crazy.  It beeped for a while but apparently the nurse could not hear it.  I silenced the unit and we gave a call to the nurse’s station.  It took probably 10 minutes for the nurse to come in and take care of it (and me silencing the unit every 2 minutes).  When she finally arrived she changed out the meds and went to add another potassium bag.  This took her a bit of time to set up and, during the set up the unit kept beeping and beeping.  George finally glared at her and said “can you shut that thing up!”  So then she kept on top of silencing it whenever it started to beep while she kept on trying to get the line going.  She left the room after getting it going and the stupid thing started beeping for air in the line.  She came back in and tried to fix it and thought she had but a few minutes later it started again.  Needless to say, the patient was very, very angry!!

This evening I left the room to make a phone call and was gone a while, but forgot to put the call button low enough for George to get it.  (he was sleeping and I did not want to disturb him).  Apparently, shortly after I left one of the lines started beeping because it was complete.  No one could hear the unit beeping, George couldn’t yell loud… and so he listened to it beeping until I returned 45 minutes later.  By this time he was absolutely livid!  Not a good day for man and machine!! 

The PT came in right after all of the afternoon stuff but George was so exhausted form the beeping and stuff that he did not feel up to doing anything!  So she gave him a pass and will be back in the morning. 

We had lots of visitors today – Sara, Keith, Stan, Rob and Angie, Denise and Rosemary.  George did pretty well.  He sometimes dozed off, or listened with his eyes closed, but he managed to hold conversations.  By the end of the day he was pretty tired. We are hoping that things stay relatively quiet so we can catch up on our sleep.  Right now the only line going is the TPN – and I think that one will need to be changed out sometime during this night shift. 

Dr. Bastidas was in this morning and says things are going okay.  No other news for the day on the medical side of things. 

George and I are making peace with his current condition.  Taking a “Let’s wait and see what we are dealing with – and then deal with it” approach. 

Time for some sleep - - hopefully will get a good 5 or 6 hours in with minimal interruptions for me (maybe I will sleep through the shift change tonight?  One can hope!) 

The C Word – A New Battle Day

First, we are so thankful for all the prayers.  I think it not only helped us get through the day, but get through it with grace and peace. 

This morning I had a 6:30 appointment to meet the surgeon to tell George the news.  George was way too groggy last night to comprehend anything that would have been told to him. 

When I arrived at 5:30AM the nurse told me that he just cat-napped most of the night.  He was sort of awake when I arrived.  When Dr. Bastidas arrived he filled him in on what had taken place yesterday.

I have a correction to make from my notes yesterday.  The cancer was all over the small bowel.  He did not say today that it affected any other organs and said that the upper abdominal area looked okay.  The portion of small bowel that they left in had cancer tumors on it but they could not remove or scrape it.  Instead of leaving George with no small bowel which would be very bad, they left him with some but it has growth on it. 

George took the news fairly well, a little teary eyed.  But, as soon as Dr. B left, George said, “I just want to sleep now.”  And off to la la land he went.  A few hours later he made a comment or two but still not saying much about what was told to him.  It wasn’t until later in the day that he started asking questions about what the situation was.  I told him.  And a little later he asked me to tell him again.  (His memory retention is affected by the anesthesia.) 

Over the course of the day, especially the early part of the day, there was not a lot of talking going on.  The PT came in at 11:00 to get him to start moving his legs and then got him out of bed and standing.  That did not last long because the room was “spinning”.  He got up a second time just before 3PM because the nurse wanted to try to have him go pee as he had not done so since his cathether was removed very early this morning.  And, this evening, they not only helped him out of bed for a bathroom break but also had him sit in a chair for a short bit.  Very good progress! 

Food wise he did not eat (rather, drink) much but he did at least try.  He will be on liquids and very soft things for a bit as they intestinal track heals.  He is getting food via his feeding tube as well as minerals, etc that he was low on. 

Today Stephanie drove down for a visit.  It did her good to see her dad.  At first she was very cautious, but as time went on I think she sensed that things will settle down and we will figure out what the next step is.  She left around 4PM and I got a text from her about 8PM that she had arrived home…. 4 hours for a normally 1 ½ hour drive!!  Poor thing.

Steve and Robin, friends of ours, popped in for a visit this evening as did my co-worker Judy.  George was in good spirits and making conversation, even smiling some.  Definitely progress over this morning.

He is still in ICU even though transfer orders were done at 7AM.  There are not beds available on the next floor down.  Since he has a bed and a room, he is lower priority than others having surgery. Perhaps Friday will be a slower day and he can be moved tomorrow!!  He rather enjoys ICU because it is quieter for the most part (there have only been 6-8 patients on the floor, there are at least 20 rooms!)  But it will be easier for others to move about and come visit if he is moved, plus I will be able to stay the night.  (As I type this I just got a call from George that he is being transferred to a room tonight!!  So I will be packing up and heading back to the hospital! Hoo-rah!)

I left about 8PM as he was quite tired.  Will turn in soon.

Today I am thankful for all the prayer warriors out there, for all those that are texting and emailing.  I have touched base with the PMP sites we take part in and am getting some ideas about what kinds of questions to ask and hearing what others are doing or have done that had similar situations to George.  I am thankful for the nurses who were so very kind.  I am thankful for Dr. Bastidas and all the support he has given us. 

When George was sleeping today I had chance to listen to my “tunes” and crochet and relax.  I can feel your prayers as a sense of calm has come over me.  I feel relaxed and at peace.  I know that we can tackle whatever needs to be done.  I am sure it will have difficult moments but we will take those as they come.  It is probably easier said than done – but, for now, the only thing we are concentrating on is getting George up and about as well as get some good nutrition in him so he can come home to finish recovering.  Tomorrow will be a new day and we will take that as it comes. 

I need to stop typing so I can pack up and head back to the hospital and “move in”.  Until tomorrow