The C Word – A New Battle Day 228 Little Moments, Big Emotions

The C Word – A New Battle Day 228

Little Moments, Big Emotions

This journey we travel in the C world can be so precarious.  One of the things I learned seventeen years ago is that there will be moments frozen in time.  There will also be trigger point moments that cause a rush of emotions and make you realize just how precious life is.  There will be moments of sadness and joy. 

Today ran the gamut.

It started out with just a small gesture that many couples take for granted and yet is one that people who have undergone not only the PMP surgery but others as well may not experience very often.  Until it happened today I didn’t realize how much I missed it.  I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t thought about it but, again, didn’t realize how much I missed it.  What is “it”?  Laying side by side and “spooning”? 

Since the first surgery back in 2014 George has not been able to lay on his side.  He has made attempts but because of things being moved around in his belly he finds the position quite uncomfortable.  When he broke his neck and then had the second surgery it made it even more impossible for him to be comfortable. 

This morning, for the first time in a very long time, George rolled over on his side and spooned me.  I was so surprised. I was very touched – because I know what an effort doing that is for him.  I shed tears because that, for me, was such a precious gift.  In that moment I realized how much I missed being able to do that with him.  This simple gesture (for most people) moved me so very much.  I was both sad and happy at the same time. 

As the day progressed, I got a visit in with my sister before dropping her 

and her husband off at the airport.  Our visit this time was very brief but we were able to have a couple of good chats.

 

This afternoon George and I took a glass blowing class and had the opportunity to make a glass bowl.  I had won the pass for two from a Cancer Carepoint auction last fall.  I thought it would be a fun activity for us to do together … and it was.  It did not require a lot of stamina.  The class had eight people in it and two wonderful instructors who bore the brunt of the work and made sure that each person would have a nice quality product.  The smile on George’s face was worth every penny.  Pure joy.

After the class we then met up with friends, Sherry and Steve, to see the movie “The Shack”.  It is a deeply spiritual movie about one’s relationship with God.  Sherry had loaned me the book to read when George was in the hospital (I forget which hospital visit) so she and I knew that it would be a tearjerker. It was a great message for us.  Our relationship with Our Father is so tender and so moving.  Strong emotions to experience yet again today.

We closed the day out with dinner with Sherry and Steve and had a good time visiting, something we don’t get to do with them very often.

This was a wonderful day all-in-all.  I am pretty exhausted and emotionally drained from the activities of the day.  I would give anything to know that I had years and years more of these to come with George.  Yet unless God grants us a huge miracle, I know that I don’t have that. 

So I will make the most of the time we have.  I will continue to try to make more special moments like today.  Experiences that I can hold on to and remember.