The “C” Word – Day 192 Five Months Post-Op

Today we met once again with the surgeon.  Dr. Bastidas has become more like a “friend” each time we see him.  He is very congenial, has a sense of humor, but also knows his business.  He strolls in with his white jacket, bow tie and black clog shoes, takes a seat on his rolling chair in front of George, and simply asks “How’s it going?”  He addresses any questions we have and, if needed, backs it up with research data. 

Today’s question from George:  Does the HIPEC have any residual effect?  The response was that the actual chemotherapy does not… but the heated factor does.  He noted that there was a doctor at Sloan Kettering that, from the late 1880’s up through the 1950’s, injected a ‘toxic bug’ (I think that was the term he used but not sure) into cancer patients in order to cause them to break out into a high fever.  This high fever then, in turn, used to kill the cancer cells.  These days, Dr. Bastidas is doing another clinical trial where they do a whole-body heat up during chemotherapy to help eradicate or slow down cancer cells in women who have been diagnosed for a 3^rd recurrence of breast cancer and have no other options to try.  It has been fairly successful thus far.  He said that the “heat” somehow boosts ones immune systems and kicks it up to fight the cancer. 

Also, today we have arranged for the baseline CT scan which will take place in two weeks.  George asked what should be expected of this scan.  Dr. Bastidas said that most likely it will throw red flags to whomever reads the scans.  He expects there to be visible scar tissue as well as some of the abscess which he says is quite small compared to where it was 4 months ago but is still there.  There will be spots and things that the radiologist will not be able to confirm are cancer or whatnot, but those are the areas that we will be able to watch in subsequent scans.  This is “baseline” – the starting point.  He told us he might call or email us if anything shows up but he does not need to see George for six months.  Note: By then it will be time to schedule up the next CT scan and then it will be one year between future scans. 

All in all – a good day mentally.  Physically, George is having a hard time with his back today.  He also has started to get a sore throat so is not feeling well.  Will need to keep an eye on that – and this is probably a signal that he needs to start going back to his regular doctor to keep an eye on things as well.  He hasn’t been ill since surgery and without the spleen to fight things it will be more difficult – and he will need to stay on top of it so things don’t get super bad which will make it harder to fight.  

The “C” Word – Day 175 Four Months Post-Op

The “C” Word – Day 175

Four Months Post-Op

One of the devotionals I read this week spoke of “contagious laughter”.  In it is the story of Sarah, whom God blessed with a child very late in her life.  When God gives Sarah the news that she will bear a child she laughs in disbelief.  Just as I “laughed” at what the Lord put in front of us nearly six months ago.  On that day of August 9^th, here are excerpts of what I wrote:

“I am not sure if I understand God’s humor and his wisdom right now.  I have yet to determine just exactly which one he is imparting on us right now.

Our day had started off ordinarily enough… to accomplish a few errands.  In the middle of one of those errands George looked at me with a strange face and said, “Oh no.”  At first I was thinking he forgot his credit card but he then said that he was having the start of the same kind of pain he had when he passed a kidney stone back in 2007.  Although we made it into a room  (in ER) quickly, we ended up waiting longer than the prior trip for a doctor or nurse to come in… And then we waited and waited.

The doctor finally made his way to our room …and then the next words out of his mouth were shocking.  The radiology report indicated peritoneal cancer “seeds” that had metastasized…  And just like that our lives are turned upside down..

Is this God’s sense of humor trying to make us scared and telling us that we need to appreciate what we have – because maybe it isn’t cancer, maybe it’s something else.  Maybe it will turn out to be something serious but something that is treatable and curable?  Will we laugh when we look back at this?”

Like Sarah, we wondered if we were asking God for the impossible.  Yet God asked us then as he continues to do throughout our life journey, “Is any thing too hard for the Lord?”  (Gen. 18:14)

Six months ago I wrote:  “I can only pray that this is a treatable and curable cancer as that is easier to swallow than the other option. But God has a plan…. and now we have to wait a few more days for this plan to play out in our lives.”

Just as God promised a child to Sarah and her dream became a reality, so too our hopes and wishes have become a reality.  As George continues his progress of healing, our lives become more bright, we express joy for what He has given us.  As things head more towards normal there is, once again, more laughter in the house… and this laughter is contagious.

In the devotional it says that “when Satan bombards us with lies… it is time to look back at God’s Word and remember Sarah.  Imbed in your mind the truth that with God, nothing is impossible (Matt. 19:26).  And then, in the midst of the storm, in the darkness of the night, in the crux of the trial, laugh, letting the joy of God’s truth be your strength.”  Trust that God can do the seemingly impossible. 

And here we STAND, nearly six months after our lives were shattered by the “C” word and exactly four months post-op from a life-altering surgery, stronger in faith than we were – and, for George, stronger in body as well.  As we sit in the midst of all of this, we feel like this is taking "forever" to get better, yet in the eyes of the medical professionals and those who see George they are amazed at the progress he has made.  Somehow, when you are the one living the ordeal, nothing seems to go as fast as you would like it to.

There is still a long road ahead.  We haven’t yet found out what George’s new “normal” is as it is still evolving.  While he continues to gain strength he is far from being where he was four months ago. 

Yet the next milestone will be reached on Monday when he is set to return to work.  He returns with mixed feelings because this journey has changed who he is from the inside to the outside. He is not sure if he can handle full time work but chooses to give it the good ol’ college try to find out.  After months of sitting in a recliner, sitting in an office chair for eight hours a day will no doubt take some adjusting. It will take some time for him to keep his brain turned on for the entire day, to settle in to the routine again.

But we will take each day as we have the past six months…. one at a time.  We will deal with each hurdle…. one at a time.  We will get through this next transition… one day at a time, one moment at a time if necessary.  And we will continue to pray for strength.  As we meet and beat each obstacle we will try to remember to be joyful in the morning for what God has given to us.  There will come a time when we can look back at this period of our lives… and laugh… for we have been given new life in the face of adversity. 

The prayer at the end of the devotional simply states: “Oh God, Your Word says that You will give use the desires of our hearts (Psalm 37:4).  I trust in that, Lord.  I trust in Your Word.  I believe You can do the seemingly impossible.  Help me to rest in that assurance and to laugh with Sarah, who was given her hearts’ desire.  Amen.”[1] 

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[1] Daily Whispers of Wisdom for Women, Barbour Publishing, 2008.  

The “C” Word – Day 159 Oncology update

We had an appointment with the oncologist this week.  Before every appointment there is a blood draw to aid them during the appointment.  While not all of George’s number are totally normal, they are all very close to where they should be.  Based on the last couple of readings they are still moving in the right direction.  YEAH!!  That is good news.

The doctor has signed off on George’s return to work papers which will be February 2.  I think George has mixed feelings about going back to work at this point.  While he is bored of sitting home he sort of enjoys not having to work.  He also does not know what awaits him when he walks back in the door.  The company is not known for its’ stability these days!

Each day George tries to do a little something.  A visit to see his mom.  A trip to the grocery store.  A walk around the block.  He does not require a two hour nap after he runs errands though he does get tired pretty easily.  These are “visible” signs of progress – ones George can easily measure and thus they give him hope. 

He has been sleeping better these days, not making trips to the living room to finish the night out anymore.  I have been sleeping in a separate room for the past week - a direct result of George not being able to sleep on his side so the whoosh of air from his CPAP unit is annoying to me.  I have been sleeping very well also!!  While this is not the ideal sleeping arrangement, for now it is something we are resigned to.

This weekend we will take our first overnight trip since before surgery.  It is our last opportunity while Mom is still in rehab and we don’t have to arrange for babysitters for her.  I am looking forward to getting away.  One of the days I will spend with two of my daughters as we celebrate the life of their dad who passed from this earth 15 years ago this coming week.  It is an annual ritual that we derive much enjoyment from.  George will get some much needed “guy time” with our son-in-law as well as some grandpa time with the twins. 

I will write again once George is back to work and let y’all know how that is going.  I imagine it will probably take some time to get back in the swing of things and get used to being back in the throes of the woes of work.  It has been a LOOOOONG 4 ½ months.  His coworkers who have not seen him will most likely be awestruck with his new, slim figure!  And he will tell those who asks that, although he “looks good” now, he would not recommend this “diet” for anyone!  

The “C” Word – Day 144 and Day 145 Where has the time gone

Today, December 30^th, marks 90 days since surgery for George.  I have to say that the first 60 days post-op were probably the hardest.  Between not having appetite or no “taste buds” and not being able to breathe to developing abscesses and having no energy there have indeed been moments that we thought things would never get better.

In the past week or two there have been notable changes for the better in George’s recovery.  He is now able to walk a bit further, stay awake notably longer, drive and get out of the house some.  Where six weeks ago he could maybe only walk to the corner of the street and back he is now able to walk all the way around the block (1/2 mile) and then some.  He has walked around stores or parts of our local mall.  In the beginning this little bit of effort resulted in a two-hour nap.  Now, he can do them and though tired he is not napping as often. 

Over Christmas weekend he was able to enjoy time with his grandchildren, even able to gingerly chase them around a little bit or give them “chigger bites” (loving tickles) which they thoroughly enjoy.  They enjoyed trying to dodge his attempts at chasing them down. 

For a few nights this week he has even managed to stay in bed all night without having to resort to his recliner.  (This also enabled me to sleep better as I was not woken up when he left the room!)  Today we enjoyed a movie out – and although it was difficult for him to be comfortable in the theatre seat he did manage to hang in there for the duration of the movie. 

Although he is using the restroom less, there are still some problems going on internally.  We haven’t found the “magic” potion that will take care of that.  The surgeon said it will take a long time for his small intestine to figure out how to do the job of the large one.  It could be a full year before things are settled with his new body.

Tomorrow (Day 145 and New Years Eve Day) we will take time to have fun with some friends of ours.  Every year we have an early dinner with a special couple and then watch a movie.  We used to go out to a movie but last year we had to be home to take care of Mom – and this year, although we thought we would have to do that again, Mom is not home.  However, due to other health issues we will watch a movie in the comfort of a home.  We are almost always home by 10PM where we might stay awake long enough to watch the ball drop at midnight – but we do not fret if we fall asleep by 11!

We will ruminate over what has transpired over the past year – and pray that 2015 brings better health not only to us but to those around us.  While we pray that we never have to endure another surgery for the PMP, the reality is that there is the possibility of having to repeat this process somewhere down the road. 

My personal prayer is that we are able to push any fear for the future out of the way and make the most of each and every day that God gives us.  We still have trips to make and grandkids to watch grow up.  For the most part it looks like George’s health will improve and he can resume some of the projects that he has planned for around the house as well as having some fun out in “man land” where he can make some great things out of wood.  We seem to have been given a chance to “live life to the fullest” – and I hope we are able to take advantage of that. 

This year has been an incredible wakeup call about the fragile balance of human life.  We went from utter despair to cautious hopefulness and now appear to be on the cusp of things looking brighter than we had expected.  We sing praises for this.  We are grateful to those who have surrounded us with love, support and prayers – sometimes in the most unexpected times and places and from people we have never met. 

Hopefully we are listening for what God has planned for us.  We know that He is capable of doing much.  We have some ideas for what we want to have happen in 2015 and hope that they all play out the way we would like them to – but we also know that God has his own schedule and sometimes it is not exactly the same as ours.  We will make no resolutions that are different from what we already do as I believe we already try to “do better” no matter what time of year it is. 

So here’s to a better year in 2015.  Happy New Year – to George – and to me!  Praise God we still have each other!!

The “C” Word – Day 137 Merry Christmas

A few months back when we first got the news about George’s cancer we were not sure if George would be around for Christmas.  The prognosis was so very grim. 

Yet, here we are with Christmas just two days away.  George is alive… not yet kicking, but alive.  His stamina is still quite low so he requires naps after expending small amounts of energy to go shopping or trimming a tree.  But he smiles more, he appreciates people more – and he is aware that just being alive for Christmas is a miracle. 

Because we wanted to focus less on the “material” there are few gifts under the tree this year – and the ones there are mostly for the littlest ones in the family.  Christmas is all about the children.  And Christmas is all about family.  We will have all the “girls” here for a short while on Christmas as we come together to celebrate.  The house will be noisy and rambunctious as the kids run around. 

This will be the first Christmas of many more to come.  More than we would have expected just a mere few months ago.  There are sure to be more changes along the way as that is the way of life.  But there is hope for our future.  God willing there will be many more “tomorrows” for George, for us, for our family. 

So we wish a Merry Christmas to all those following our progress.  We know how lucky we are to have so much support from friends, family and even strangers around the globe.  No matter where you are we hope you are able to celebrate the holidays with someone you love.  And don’t forget to take a moment to remember the Saviour who came to earth so long ago that we all might be saved by grace and have hope for tomorrow because of our faith. 

Merry Christmas – from George & Dawn

The “C” Word – Day 127 Surgery follow up

Yesterday we had another follow up with the surgeon.  From the reaction, we gather that they feel George is doing stupendously.  We feel things are moving slowly – but they are more than pleased at the progress he is making.

We discussed nutrition and diet some to see what can be done to assist in getting George’s organs to function more closely to normal.  The doctor said this part is experimental and will depend on George to monitor things.  Take something out and see if it makes a difference.  Try this, try that.

Our first mini-step will be taking milk and cheese out of the diet for a couple of days.  If that works, then we maintain that for a while.  If it doesn’t, plan B will be to try some Metamucil and/or Immodium to see if that helps.   One of those three things should be of help. 

The doctor is still suggesting that George try some sort of high-protein thing once a day as well as add in some additional electrolytes (i.e. Gatorade, coconut water).  He also said he should be taking a multi-vitamin.  These are all things I have offered to him and suggested to him but he still is giving some push-back on.  Coming from the doctor (again), perhaps he is starting to listen??

The one thing that concerns George is that the largest of the abscesses is apparently not all the way gone.  He is wondering if there is something he can do to help that but he forgot to ask the doctor.  Not sure that there is anything except allowing the body time to absorb the fluid.  The doctor did not seem concerned. 

The good thing we found out is that even though the oncologist indicated that he thought the first CT scan would be in January (the 3 month mark), Dr. Bastidas said that due to the slow growth nature of this cancer that he will do it between the 4 and 6 month post-surgery period.  This would be our baseline CT scan for future “watch”.  He does not want to do it yet because there has been so much done internally to George plus the additional abscesses that to do it sooner would have to many other obstructions in the way to get a good baseline scan.  After the first year he will do one annually.

Our next appointment will be at the end of February! Whoopee!  The appointments between the oncologist and surgeon are starting to be stretched out a bit.  That sure is a nice feeling.  It has also now been about a month since George’s release from the hospital (the 2^nd time around) – and we have not had any major incidences - - so we are grateful for that.

After the appointment and after some lunch, George went on a short shopping trip.  His skinniest of skinny jeans were not small enough so I had purchased an inexpensive pair of the next size down.  He wanted to get a pair of trousers to wear to church on Christmas Eve and also a belt that fit.

This weekend I hope to get some serious baking done so I have some goodies to give people!  I got a few things done last weekend.  This is an attempt at “normalcy”!  Last weekend Steph helped me put the outside lights up.  George said that there are a couple of areas where they are drooping a little bit.  My comment, “At least they are up!”  He agreed. 

On a side note: For the past few weeks we have had to deal with George’s mom having viral pneumonia.  This has meant additional care for her as she could not go to daycare.  George’s sister spent a lot of time at the house taking care of mom during the day while the caregivers still did their morning and evening shifts.  She appears to be doing better in the pneumonia arena but this has left her very weak and unsteady on her feet.  She started back to daycare for just a few hours a day for the past couple of days – today we will try for her normal Saturday routine of about 6 hours and see how she does. Tomorrow I will be on-duty with her – and will allow her to sleep in until her body says she is ready to get up.  This house is sort of a mixed up “sandwich generation” where I care for hubby and mother in law rather than mother in law and young children.  When I went to the caregiver meeting last week and said that I also care for my mother in law who has Alzheimer’s (and laughed while I said it), they all looked at me with amazement.  I said, “Hey, at least I am still laughing!”  God has some warped sense of humor sometimes… and laughter is a glorious way of coping. 

The “C” Word – Day 119 Banner day

Today was special.  George made a couple of major accomplishments since all of this started.  He wore jeans for the first time in over 2 months.  We had to go through his closet to find his “skinny” clothes – 2 sizes smaller than the prior ones.  He came downstairs in them and I had to do a double take.  He is so skinny now.  He teared up – not only because of the size of the clothes, but he looked in the mirror and truly saw the change there.

We then went to run a couple of errands – and I asked if he would like to take a turn at driving.  So he drove us around today.  We stopped at the mall and walked a little bit there.  Then we went to visit some dear friends, Rob & Angie.  Rob has had his own trials this year so the four of us have gotten closer this year as we have all been dealing with issues.  We have taken turns lifting each other up in prayer and spent time encouraging and visiting. 

After that we went out for lunch to one of our favorite Mexican restaurants.  George ate one of his usual meals and did quite well.  Of course, we are both still full so dinner will be something small. 

While he still has discomfort when sitting and laying down, those seem to be getting slightly better with each day.  This was helped somewhat by getting one of those special cushions that take the pressure off of the tailbone.  “Little by slow”, progress is made.

I told George that him being able to drive again means that he does not have to tell me “the next time you go shopping can you get _______?”  He can get up and take himself shopping.  Hmmm, maybe I can get him to do some of the weekly shopping??  LOL!